Specificity Leads to Intentionality

This post is by Sabeth Kapahu.

We don’t have to believe everything we think. But what we think will impact what we do 100% of the time. And as much as we’d like to say that as women, wives, mothers, sisters, aunties, friends, and team members we’ve mastered mind over matter, the reality of our emotions, the distractions that surround us, means that even if we know what's true there will be times that we still believe the lie: “I’m too tired, too old, too young, too slow, too far removed, too fragile, too inexperienced, too sensitive, too weak, in too deep to get out now.”

As children, we try to shape our own individual thoughts and then spend our days adjusting and correcting them based on the lesson plans, experiences and caring adults that surround us. As adolescents we test out our theories about life and continue to shape our thoughts based on experiences that happen for us or to us. Some we choose; perhaps some are out of our control. Then somewhere along the way as adults, we give ourselves permission to re-parent our hearts and minds, communicate our wants and needs, and unlearn the habits we knowingly or unknowingly picked up as children, tested as teens, and solidified as we secured an adulting position in the world. 

When we finally learn how to think about what we think with specificity, intentionality begins to take root. Specificity leads to intentionality which results in lasting change within our minds and eventually actions. But it takes time, repetition, and more time.  Though we might believe a lie or two along the way, when we get specific about what we want based on who we are and whose we are the narrower the hallway for those lies to camp becomes. 

The journey gets difficult because it takes time to get to know ourselves, to get curious about why we’ve come to certain thought patterns and the behaviors that result. With each day that passes our lives become increasingly full, pushing out the space needed to get curious, to quiet our hearts long enough to answer the questions that dig beneath the surface of our thought lives. 

This is where our daily habits make all the difference, when how we start our mornings matters, and who we choose to surround ourselves with changes everything. Because, sometimes believing the truth takes hard work, discipline, and hope. It takes working towards a goal we can’t see yet. A goal someone else can see for us, can push us towards with love, can speak into when we are at a loss for words. There will be mornings when we’d rather lay in bed and scroll through the lives of others outside our four walls than attend to the humans within them, let alone take care of ourselves. 

So I ask you, “what do you want?” and “when will they know?” Do you want to wake up 10 minutes earlier? When will your family see you going to bed 10 minutes earlier the night before? Do you want to have more energy mid day? When will your co-workers notice an increase in your hydration? (Hack: fill your water bottle up the night before.)  Do you want to draw nearer to The Lord? When will you put down your phone and have a conversation with Him, or be still enough to invite him to chat and actually listen for what he wants you to hear? These small, specific, intentional choices change the outcomes of our days, and they begin with what we think about ourselves and what we believe is possible with the time that we have.

Sabeth Kapahu is the owner of Invited Back LLC, and the Communications Specialist & Executive WiLD Coach at WiLD Leaders Inc. She’s passionate about encouraging and inviting leaders, especially women, to re-imagine, re-invent, and re-invite a  sense of purpose into all they do. She lives with her husband and four kids in Hilo, Hawaii.

Photo by Ronnie Overgoor on Unsplash