His Fruit, Not Mine

This post is by Kelli LaFram.

My Bible would lay on the table. Not collecting dust, but open and waiting for me to read the words, turn the pages, take in God’s truth. And I did. Day after day after day, I would get up early in the morning excited to have as much time as possible with God and His Word. When my young family would start to wake and the rest of the day began, I would set my Bible open on the kitchen table planning to steal as many moments away with it as possible.

That was 2013 and the year I first discovered Hello Mornings. I, though I had known of God all my life, was still young in my understanding of His grace. The Hello Mornings ministry’s was also young and the founder Kat Lee had a simple goal: to teach women to spend time with God, plan their day, and move for Him first thing in the morning. God time. Plan time. Move time. This was just what I needed and I jumped right in. 

I had just given birth to my fourth child, I was taking on a new role as a stay at home mom, and we were living in a new town. Life was changing in ways I didn’t know how to deal with on my own. I needed God and I needed His people. Within a few months I was leading an HM accountability group. I also started a blog about my time in God’s word and soon began writing Bible studies. In 2015 Hello Mornings chose my second study Caught by Jesus to be featured in one of their 6-week challenges.

I don’t tell you these things to brag about how well I was doing. I tell you these things to show you some of the fruit that the Spirit was producing in my life. If I am completely honest, getting up early does not come naturally to me. Studying God’s word does not come naturally to me. Writing about God’s word isn’t natural for me. I’d rather sleep in, read Jane Austen or scroll through the internet for hours. I am a sinner and my sin likes to be indulged. Especially my sin of pride.

I don’t know when it happened but at some point my desire to be in God’s word began to fade. My blog posts dried up. Writing studies for Hello Mornings became a chore, and I dreaded to see what the content editors had to say about my work. Even going to church turned into something I had to do. I may not know when the change started, but I do know why it started. Pride.

Somewhere along the line I started taking credit for all of the fruit that God was choosing to produce in my life. I became arrogant because I knew how to study God’s word. I had a growing blog. I had my name on the author page of several Bible studies. I, I, I, I. I was pushing myself into the spotlight of my own heart and in doing so I was forcing Jesus backstage.

God doesn’t want us dependent on ourselves. He doesn’t need our strength, our smarts, or our ability to read and write to further His kingdom. He wants humble and willing servants who know they are dependent on Him. God works through these people.

Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me. I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in Me, and I in him, bears much fruit; for without Me you can do nothing.

- John 15:4-5

Not too long ago, I confessed my lack of desire for the things of God. He was faithful -- as He always is -- to forgive and cleanse (1 John 1:9). I have begun waking early again to spend time with my Father. Just this morning He revealed my pride. I confessed and the tiniest bud of fruit, in the form of this blog post, has sprouted. I look forward to seeing and experiencing the rest of the fruit He plans to produce in my life. 

His fruit, not mine.

Kelli LaFram is actually Kelli LaFramboise, but no one can pronounce that, so with the permission of her husband and four kids she writes under the shorter pen name. Her neighbors have started referring to her bunch as the LaFram Fam. In addition to writing for Hello Mornings, Kelli has also led bible studies in her home and served in the children’s ministry at her local church. Kelli is an elementary school teacher and her hobbies include blogging about God’s word, listening to audiobooks with her children, drinking good coffee, hand painting faith-based signs (but not after too much coffee), and helping her carpenter husband build furniture. You can find her at www.quietlyreminded.com, https://www.facebook.com/KelliLaFram/, and https://www.instagram.com/kellilafram/. 

Photo by Max Delsid on Unsplash